MORE MADDIE CHRONICLES (On Piddles)

Hey Sketchy. When are you letting the Piddles out? I have a subcontracting opportunity for them. What was that? No! No, I’ve not seen your left shoe. Okay, so you put two under the coffee table and one is missing. Why are you narrow eyeing me? I am perfectly innocent. Perhaps you’re shoe has been quarantined for testing positive to Sketchyness. What’s that? What’s the subcontracting opportunity? Um that’s classified. How could you allege that I would have them piddle on your shoe? I was simply going to show them the essentials of follow the leader. I cannot be held responsible for any BMs that may or may not occur. Maddie Out!

Muwahahahahaha! Beware! Oh Bald Sketchy One. The Army of Anti-Sketchy Senjis is in training to Keep Insensitive Cowardly Known Errant Reprobates of Sketchy disciplined. That’s Right! My puppy ASS KICKERS are already capable of left shoe relocation. They have not yet mastered the subtleties of hiding the sketchy totem, but give me time Two Legs! Their curly tail to shoe weight ratio will soon level out and they’ll be able to carry it without nose diving down the stairs. Yes I may have laughed a bit when the went tail over teakettle. My Piddles have registered their grievances concerning the Crate in Place edict that you have frivolously employed on them. It’s just not smart to lay on the couch in their line of sight, Dude! It’s even worse to let them hear a theme song! ?Bad Two Legs, Bad Two Legs, Whatcha Gonna Do When the Piddles Come For You? There had better be some warm cheese eggies and steak on the menu real soon. Maddie out!

Oh My Dog! The Two Legs are acting strange.
I thought the Sketchinator was gaining some enlightenment by bringing me my Piddle minions. But no, he continues to lower the learning curve for all Two Legs. He and the Blonde Two Legs have taken to voluntarily wearing muzzles. Since they’ve been staying home I’m suspicious that there is Sketchyness afoot. Now I know Tempest and Gambitch often get muzzled when they’re on a trip to chase bunnies. The Bald Boob says it’s because they will bite lines. This could be the reason as they only wear the muzzles when the go out for eggs and milk. The problem with that is it’s normally Baldy that brings back those essentials. We can all just agree that a Maddie without eggies is just a call for The Shadow to retaliate. It is essential that my belly is served and filled. Anyway, it ought to be the Blonde Two Legs that gets muzzled as I have much greater confidence that she has the mastication ability to chew through the long lines that the Two Legs complain about when they return. She’s like Gambitch in that regard. So there must be another reason. The Blonde did say it improved the Bald Boob’s appearance so maybe it’s that. I must admit that I’ve been a bit distracted with the new entertainment: Keeping Up With the Piddles. Baldy has underestimated how quickly my little red curly tailed Shadowlings are learning to throw Shade. I have already taught them to relocate his Sketchers of Sketchyness. Unfortunately, as it is with all new recruits teaching them the difference between left and right is difficult. Those little needle teethed bitches keep grabbing the right one instead of the all Sketchy left one. Speaking of needle teethed, sometimes the training sessions devolve and bite me in the tail. Literally. Alita, distracts me with an attempted run and Thena zooms in for a grab of my tail. Now, as we all know “Who knows which Piddle gets rolled in the grass? The Shadow Does!” So if my butt gets nipped, you’re getting flipped. Maddie out!

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