The Rip Van Wrinkler,
XXIV, Issue 14, February 2020

Page 14 <previous page> <next page>

Trill, Pears, S K-M



Natalie Culver

I was busy with Hannah’s bday party last Sunday, 1/5, that I didn’t realize the date. Was a year ago half way through his year 13 we said goodbyes to our good-boy (7/5/2005 - 1/5/2019). Obike was a gooder-boy. ? He loved scratching up a blankie to warm it on his chair (the lazy boy recliner, we call “the lazy dog” recliner). He was all doggie whenever a shard of chewwie bone or part of a mozzarella cheese stick was “his” (he HAD to bury it somewhere in the house, usually under clean laundry pile, or in my not yet unpacked suitcase) he got cutest glazed instinct look and would pace around to find the hiding spot to “bury” his treasure. He was a lap dog, snuggling up on the couch. And he fell in love with Nicholas, toddler and old dog could always be found snuggling. And he slept at my feet, under the covers for the 13 & a half years of fun I had with him. He never slept went off at bedtime with Harry, or Hannah, or Nicholas, or even with Kunjo his older buddy, Obike always slept snuggled up at my feet. He would pace around the house at night waiting for me to get in bed. We miss our Obike! (photo is Obike with baby Nicholas)

Lisa Stewart

Basenjis will never make it as physical therapists. I was using one of Bolts doga peanut shaped balls to do this exercise. First Gambit Discovered I had freshly shampooed hair and started rolling on my head, then Bolt says, hey that’s my doga ball and try’s to climb on top the ball to balance. Maddie looks on waiting for the next act.

Sally Wuornos We don't need entertainment we have to pay for, when we own basenjis!

Lisa Stewart its a constant circus act.

Sally Wuornos Lisa Stewart yup.

Sally Wuornos Yesterday we left Jolson loose upstairs. When we got home he had jumped 2 gaits to go downstairs to keep Rosie company, and get into Kari's things.

Karla Schreiber I used a new shampoo over the weekend. Omg! A NEW shampoo!! You'd have thought I washed my hair with bone broth! ???

Lisa Stewart Bone broth shampoo, what a great idea!

Hi - Just PI checking in on this purrfectly yucky snowy day.My Owner so does not have a sense of humor but she is so careful not to hurt my feelings . She was heading out to the barn to finish barn chores round two when to my surprise she brought home a whole load of hay just for me ( um not really PI for the horses but I would never tell him that ) So up on top of the hay I go as my owner is loading her Aussies to go to work out in the barn . She calls me down and I say nope drive slow .So she is creeping along and I know she is watching when I decided to thump on her roof for a better view ,she creeps to a stop and opens the driver door .Well you see I'm in the middle and refuse to come in still . We round the corner to the barn and I get a good laugh ,the horses see me ,I made them flee .They snorted at me and ran around my point was made ,I'm still the king . So my next step was to slide down the windshield and look at my driver ,um her face was not happy but just perfect for me . She again stopped the truck because now she could not see and she reached for me and I gave in and came in her truck . Her Aussies start kissing me which I really do like but I still had chores to so when she stopped I got back out making sure the hay was here to stay . You know it was stacked high so when geese went by I pounced from above and heard in a laugh that's my PI and then the That'll do words so again I stopped ,but it was quite a sight when I landed on a goose with a plop oh and yes it was noisy but I'm just PI

About the November Wrinkler!

Karen Terry What a wonderful publication!

Lotta Olsson Thank you for a great Wrinkler ? And Hio made it again

Jackie Dering Love this issue! So many beautiful pictures and laughs.

Debby Mayer 90! Wow!

Anne MacMillan Excellent as always ????

Karla Schreiber Another great Wrinkler! Zevon says thank you for his pic, and it was ?? to see all the leaf photos - including Kevlar's.... I also think the new photo contest theme is going to elicit some epic entries - grin!!

Chris O'Rear Yes, another great Wrinkler!! Make me smile and think Great job as always and thank you for including Swagger

Renee Meriaux Great read!

Lisa Stewart Great reminder to get back to the trick dog training. Need to teach 3 more for the girls expert level/ AKC TKP. We normally spend the winter months working Tricks and rally as we don’t want to travel much then.

Dennis Allen Great job Susan.


The Maddie Chronicles: Hey Baldy! We need to talk.

You have not been fulfilling your part of the Two Legs belly sustainment contract. As you know I did not concur nor sign the Blonde Two Legs’ Die Ate accords. My position is that bellies were made to be filled and rubbed. In fact if my position is on my back rub it, if not feed it. Now there have been several instances where you have provided the Blonde with a significant upgrade in feeding. That’s right! I’m talking about that Filet Mignon you provided the Blonde and I got kibble and chicken broth. Despite my subtle prodding by whine and right paw I was told “I’m not sharing”. This Is Unacceptable! I also only got the tail of the chocolate bunny cake before your Sketchy Bald Tuchas smacked my nose! That Sir, was unsolicited physical contact. I know my rights! If you don’t feed me no loins, keep your hands to yourself. Therefore I have placed your left shoe in timeout. The length of the time out will depend on when you discern that I took it and your ability to locate it. Given displayed lack of mental acuity I’m thinking next week so here’s a clue. I’m letting that sketchy totem cool it’s heels in timeout. Now you’ve referred by my nickname The Shadow because I’m always watchin. Let me tell you my other nickname: It’s Karma, cause I’m not a Dog, Ima Bitch. Maddie out!

The Maddie Chronicles: That untrainable Bald Two Legs did it again.

He disrespected me, again with unadulterated Sketchiness! He allowed the Blonde Two Legs to take me into the poke and stick place and announce my weight. It’s a good weight! I worked hard to get it and No I don’t think it’s time for a diet Thank you Very much! Anyway, as I was recovering my Dogitude from that affront, the Sultan of Sketchy invited a Two Legged Invader into my home. I heard the ring announcing the start of his invasion. I almost had him too, but that Bald Boob beat me to the outside door and shut me out. Now that isn’t a problem as I am a certified reentry professional. I can work that door like a Two Legs works a can opener. But that unpapered chew toy locked the Master Bedrokm so I couldn’t get to the violator! Oh I gave them a piece of my mind! I barked, I yanked!, I scratched! And I Whined. “Shut up, Maddie!” Is not a Term of endearment and falls pretty far into the Sketchy SOB range! This called for an immediate cessation of the footwear protocols. I had to be creative. Baldy was keeping a close eye on me so I settled on the couch and assumed my Shadow persona. I sent my playhound over to initiate the monster under the covers game. Now I had a moment of weakness and joined the play. I gave good chomp to that monster, but I was on a mission. I left him while the playhound was cleaning his ear. That always causes him to close his eyes. I slowly inches toward the coffee table and during an eye lick by my partner in crime I snatched his totem of sketchy behavior: The Left shoe. I had to get innovative. He had found many of my spots. Under the bed, in the toilet, behind the couch, all these options would allow too quick a retrieval. Then I heard it. Save the turtles! Stop allowing plastic straws to get in the water. I could work with this. I ran outside with the offending member and deposited at the bottom of the fountain. His violation was a squishyable offense after all. However, to screen it from his view I placed the zombie turtle on top to hide it from casual discovery. Oh you should have seen the glares, felt the foot stomps, and heard the toxic grumbles as Sketchyness departed his body. I stood outside and laughed as he finally spotted the soggy totem. He said it’ll take at least an hour in the dryer to be wearable. I have achieved my reparation. Maddie

The Maddie Chronicles: That’s right. I was compelled to do it.

I have issued an article of Impoochment to the Bald Two Legs. He is guilty of High Crimes against the State of Maddie Contentment. The Two Legs knowingly left me without my pointy eared playhound Furever! It was more than a two paw long absence. The substitute Two Legs does not know how to cook! There were no warm eggies or bacon. This is a direct violation of the Tummy Protocols. Also, there were no belly rubs to ease the Black Hole that took up occupancy there without the rendering of my authorized Treats. I recognize a de facto Die Ate when I don’t taste it. This places the Supreme Executor of Sketchyness up IT Creek without a Maddie! I considered the extent of his violation, the loss of tautness to my tummy, and the scope of my previous disciplinary actions. It was time for the Shadow to go Poopular! I bided my time. I wiggled my butt a bit to serve as a distraction until he got comfortable enough to take off That Shoe. The Sketchy Left One. It took awhile, but finally, he was distracted with the other Pack members and I struck! Sketchyness Secured! I hid it where I knew he wouldn’t look. The laundry room! It serves as the indoor rainy day toilet for the pointies. There are papers and tile and for what I intended it was perfect. I gently laid the shoe on the floor and then deposited...... The Tootsie Roll of Doom! The most severe admonishment a Two Legs can receive. It ensures the violator knows they have stepped in Deep IT with their fur bearing children! It may even be more than figurative if he doesn’t pay close attention. Don’t Mess with the Maddie or you get The Shadow! Maddie

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